Great Balls of Fire: Atlanta 2012

Sweethearts! We know, we know. We have been very, very naughty! We have left you, bereft, of our quips and bon mots, and we know you were waiting on baited breath for our Atlanta edition.

Very naughty. Perhaps we should be spanked. Woo! Oh, Prince McMillian... ahem. Best we not even *hint* at something so naughty, as it could possibly make Katherine Morgan a wee bit jealous.

Well, my petite chous (that's little cabbage in French, for those Gangrel reading this.. ahem..) we ran off to L.A. for Fashion Week (dresses and parties to die for!!) and by the time we got back, hurricane! And not the tasty beverage kind! (Not that we could drink that. Give us the red stuff!)

No children, we are talking about twelve feet of water in our basement and we are still without power. And yet -- somehow, darlings, we were able to pull together this issue. We are back and better than ever! Nevermind the Bullocks, Here's Crash and Burn: Atlanta 2012!!


Darlings, Darlings. Oh. Atlanta. Dear ones. Please. You must seriously learn to dress.


Worst Dressed

Crash:  Katherine Morgan, Gangrel Primogen of Middle Georgia, is a belly dancer gone horribly, horribly wrong in this red velvet and fishnet number with the weird little red fascinator.  This outfit does absolutely nothing for you.

Burn: *inhales deeply* Oh my god, this is SUCH a train wreck I need popcorn! Did a cat attack a seagull and in the process destroy a macrame' dreamcatcher?? Oh honey, there you go, letting your freak flag fly. Bless your heart.

 Crash:   Sybil Chandler-Blanchett, Tremere, or "Eyepatch Girl", as we have taken to calling her, was such a train wreck, she made the list twice.  We weren't sure which of her Pirate/Rocky Horror/saloon-girl/supervillain outfits (with matching eyepatches) was the worst.  The white high-collared wedding gown kind of reminds me of Beetlejuice.

Burn: Crash is just jealous of the fabulousness of the Eyepatch! You go, Eyepatch Girlfriend! Obviously, Davy Blanchett, the Toreador you married that weekend thinks you're fabulous too. Though, really, a Toreador-Tremere marriage? Oh yeah, that's going to end well. /eyeroll.

 Crash:  This one seems to be taking fashion cues from Archon Caia Wickham.  Seriously.  Of all the people on God's Green Earth to take fashion tips from, you choose Archon Wickham?  At least she could have copied the Archon's sweet green leather trench coat while she was at it.

Burn: Chiton, the Nosferatu Scourge of Savannah! What is it with Nos and hats? This looks rather Julian Lennon meets Claire Danes. I do love the little glare she's giving, I must say; however, Crash is right --   please quit letting Archon Wickham be your fashion stylist.

 Crash:   A real class act with the red bra sticking out of the corset.  Pleather pants and stripper boots really just complete the ensemble.  What's the statement here?

Burn: That statement is "I'm Brujah, I can do what I want!" Oh, my dear, my dear, you really can't.

 Crash:   Anarch couple!! She is way-too-cute for him.  Whereas this hillbilly apparently didn't get the message about the dress code.  I know it's the south and everything, but grown men wear long pants and sleeves to formal events.  She's cute though.

Burn: I am adoring the little blue faux-hawk she has rocking here. Tres adorable! Yes you're fierce. So fierce! Yes, you are! Oh yes, you are! Good Anarch! Gooooood Anarch! And oh yes, Hillbilly Anarch Boyfriend, get some shoes. We are vampires, not hobbits. Please.

Crash:  Jane Larabie, Child of Haqim, corporate and cold, with a winning smile, this CoH really fell flat here with this stunningly unflattering black bureaucrat's uniform.

Burn: All I am going to say is accessories!! A sparkly necklace, some rings, or maybe a rose in the lapel would have added wonders to this outfit. Seriously, my dear, you are at a party! Let your hair down!  She's  really Ventrue, isn't she? Someone let us know.

Crash: And here modeling formal eveningwear from the Great White North, we have Tony Maietta, Brujah Primogen from Portland, ME in his signature orange puffy vest.  We're pretty sure he stores moose meat in the front pockets of that thing.  Stay classy, Tony.  Never change.

Burn: I can't compete with moose meat.








Best Dressed

 Crash:  Archon Douma Charoum, Tremere,  looking dapper and professorial in a sharp tan suit.  This guy obviously knows what he's doing.  Balck in Atlanta in September just doesn't seem fitting, but this man has the whole Southern-Gentleman thing down.

Burn: Dear Archon Charoum, can you please, pretty please with sugar on top, give your Clanmate and fellow Archon Caia Wickham some tips on dressing? You look smashing and professional, with a lovely briefcase, rather than a fannypack. Ahem.

Crash:  I may be slightly in love with Lilyanna Salvatore, Toreador, Seneschal of Middle Georgia. The asymmetrical sheer pleating on this dress adds interest to a classic.  And those shoes are some of the best we have seen all year.  A+.

Burn: The hair, the necklace, the dress... the SHOES. Perfect, perfect package, my dear! Two snaps in Z formation!! What I can not fathom is how Faulkner could stand her up, twice, my dears. TWICE. More in the gossip section, my sweets.

 Crash:  Ever the belle of the ball.  Rachel, you had us in Baltimore.  No one rocks a corset and 1860s inspired skirt like you do.  The fascinator with the white rose in your honey colored hair and the silvery hues of this ensemble are hard not to notice.

Burn: I am seriously considering turning this magazine into the "The All Rachel, All the Time" zine!  Not that I am a stalker.. Ahem. I love this woman's sense of fashion! Totes! Even for the obvious "informal night" (which every event this year has had, seriously, peeps, originality much), she is rocking a gorgeous purple number, with a lovely gold bracelet on her arm. Perfection.  Formal night with the black and silver dress and corset with the gloves and matching fascinator for the hair? Swoon. I swoon.

Crash:  I love a well-dressed gentleman, and this one makes me think I better watch myself at the Blackjack table.  Red tie and pocket square, pale fedora and warm toned silk vest for the win.

Burn: Donald Tennent, Tremere. Seriously, when did the Tremere learn to be so dashing! They are most definitely giving the Toreador a run for their money! Separarely, the elements of this outfit are nice, just nice. However, together, they completely compliment each other and bring together this lovely outfit. Hats off, good sir! Hat's off!









Gossip

It is with regret that we report that Party Person and Host with the Most  Niko Athanasius was killed in Atlanta.  Sad Panda. That boy had some style. Not sure what that style was, mind you, but he had it. He also set up Davy Blanchett's Bachelor Party, as some shiftless ne'er-do-wells (Simon Random ahem) procrastinated and "forgot" to throw the party. Niko took over and woo! What a party was had! It even made CNN!! (ooohboy.)  Simon Random, sadly, is no Shanghai Kelly.  He also apparently  "forgot" to hold a poker tournament he had announced.


Did you hear that Lilyanna Salvatore was stood up by her own prince -- TWICE? For shame, Prince Faulkner! Did you see how beautiful that woman is? And those legs!? It is no wonder that Scott Daine, Ventrue, stole your date. We saw those two dancing the night away and oh my, sparks flew!  PS. Prince Faulkner, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Ahem.

Last but not least, my dears, my dears, the lovely wedding that was held between Davy Blanchett and Sybil Chandler - we are so very sorry to say that we heard that it is in name only and for political reasons. WHY anyone would marry as a Kindred is beyond us, children (Sugartits, Katja, dear, perhaps you could explain?) but to not dance with your wife at your wedding until the very end? Tacky. Mr. Blanchett, don't you worry though, I am sure she won't light you on fire... oh wait... she's a Tremere? Nevermind.

See you soon!! Dress your best!
Kisses!
Crash and Burn

PS. Prince McMillian -- we have been very, very naughty. Ahem.  (For details, consider a subscription to the premium content.)

OOC:  Well done, everyone.  Even when we rip into you, we still think the costuming efforts are commendable.  Keep it up!