Glitter and Gloom 2013

My dears, my dears, it is time for the Best Dressed Event of the Season - yes, my Darlings, we are talking about Glitter and Gloom!

Just what is it about Baltimore that makes all the Kindred bring out such fashionable fashions? We almost didn't have any Worst Dressed Entries! (Almost, darlings, almost!)

Dear Mid-West - this how you do a theme!  XOXO love, Baltimore!

Seriously, darlings, seriously. This is how you do a theme for your party. Not crappy Ren Faire but with style. Oh Baltimore, how we love you so. Seriously. Your sense of style and fashion warms our cold, undead hearts. Friday Night's theme was "Clubs Throughout Time" and it was delicious. So many people in truly fabulous club wear through out the ages. Saturday was the Black, White and Silver Screen Ball. To say the fashions were divine is an understatement!

Truly, dear sweet Kindred, look no farther than Baltimore to know how to dress for a party!! We had a plethora of amazing things to bring to you, it was so hard to chose! It was not hard, however, to find Worst Dressed - as we had so few contestants. We did find a few for your viewing pleasure, of course!!


Best Dressed

Crash: This guy had it going on in with is bowler hat, walking stick, french cuffs, and wild west style. It's hard to pull off a walking stick.  Most of the time, people just end up looking like rejects from the set of Lord of the Rings, but  Solomon Bawler, Nosferatu, Harpy of Philadelphia  was simply smashing.

Burn:Gentleman-style! A truly smashing affair. The whole look was perfect, down to the accessories. Love the tie!! Hip hip, cheerio! (That's Victorian for snaps!)

Crash:  Lilah's been real hit or miss this past season.  This year's event in Baltimore was more of the same.  Saturday night, this kitten sported a sleek black dress with a faux leather corset feature that had little black rubber spikes on the shoulders and the front panels.  Just the right amount, too.  With the 50s Marilyn Monroe hair, and the amazing framing on that neckline, Ms. Ashford was elegantly, if dangerously dressed.

Burn: The oh, so lovely Anarch, Lilah Ashford. This amazing dress and corset number totally shows off her assets. Ahem. Love the spike details on the shoulders as well!

Crash: Olivia, Brujah from Hartford had this sweet rockabilly thing happening with her Friday night outfit.  The fabric was inspired by 50s horror comics, and though not captured in the sketch, she had bits of cherry red crinoline peeking out from under that epic circle skirt.  The hair and the earrings frame her face beautifully, and with those strappy shoes, she stood almost six foot four.  Say what you will about tall ladies, but they should never be afraid to rock out with their Amazon selves, and wear heels as high as they want.  Any man who says otherwise has something to compensate for.  I love me some tall ladies.
  
Burn: Look at those earrings and the hair! I love the swooshy skirt and the colors of the dress. The Jacket just *makes* the outfit. Gorgeous and fun.

Crash: Oz Stevenson, Toreador Harpy of Westchester County, NY might easily have been mistaken for the Wizard.  (There was an entire homage to the cast of the 1939 film running around - more on this later).  He looked dashing in his classic black tie with the enchanting lady in green, Ms. Lilyan Townsend, Toreador  of .. oh wherever she lives now.  Maybe Annapolis.  That emerald satin gown is effortlessly classy with its origami-inspired floral details in matching fabric.  THIS is how it done, people.  THIS.

Burn: Green is apparently Ms. Townsend's color. I love the little accents with Mr. Stevenson's attire, the white pocket square just makes this outfit. Really, Crash, while they look perfectly lovely, compared to the fabulousness and fun outfits of the evening, I am less impressed.

Crash:  Rook, Toreador Prince of Annapolis on Saturday night looking rather sleek, modern and cut in his black and white ensemble.  This guy makes white look both elegant and easy.  Reclining in a board room chair overlooking the stylish Fell's Point in Baltimore, Prince Rook has it down.

Burn: This makes up for the horrible Hawaiian shirt at Nonclave 2012 event. Seriously! Prince Rook, such a hottie in this gorgeous white jacket. I am going to swoon here.

Crash: Simple, classic strapless dress, with a sweetheart neckline and a fishtail hem draped so beautifully off of the frame of Archon Victoria Hunter.  Take notes, class.  Take notes.

Burn:  Snaps, Archon Hunter!! All of your compatriot Archons who attended were wearing the most boring of suits. You brought some well-needed style to the Archon ranks. Seriously stunning.













Worst Dressed

Crash: Is it Madonna? Is it Lady Gaga?  Nope, just Lena!, Brujah former Prince from Cedar Rapids? in an 80s-inspired ensemble with little lace gloves.

Burn: Oh Lena!  We know you can't see yourself in the mirror, but seriously, hire some ghoul stylists so that you don't make this mistake again. This outfit is like a cross between Holly-Go-Lightly and Pretty in Pink.Seriously! We are officially removing that exclamation point at the end of your name until you learn how to dress better!!! No exclamation points for you!

Crash:  Lilah Ashford, Brujah Anarch from Hartford seems to have something against pants.  Friday night, she wore, um, no pants.  This sequined magenta spandex one-piece paired with 5 inch heels with a one-inch platforms certainly showcased her assets.  Ahem.


Burn:  Lilah, darling, you did so well the next night but Friday club night - woah. Just. Um. Wow.  The hair and the top are divine -- but shortie shorts and stiletos??

Crash: Jane Woodward, Nosferatu from Westchester County, NY in a tangerine orange strapless mermaid gown, hipster glasses, and that ridiculous hat.  Remember what we said about trade marks?  This was not what we meant.

Burn:  The hat... the orange gown? Gawd.Jane, Jane, Jane. Please, for the love of all things, ditch that hat. It's worse than Julius Cole's terrible topper.

 Worst Dressed (and Best Dressed!)- - Our hats are off to the Court of Baltimore -  Tin Man (Samantha Hart - Seneschal), Glenda the Good Witch (Alicia Knight - Keeper), Dorothy (Mercy  - Harpy), but, seriously, Prince Luther Rommel of Baltimore - a "cowardly" medal necklace for your Cowardly Lion costume!! For SHAME. BOOO!!!! This was your super fabulous party! At least put in an effort! The rest of your court went above and beyond to match the Silver Screen theme and looked fantastic. We are sure you could have stolen Prince Tommy Truelove's fur coat and worn that as a costume! Boo!! 

Best Hair

Shoes were so 2012!

This year, my sweet dark things, this year, we will focus on the best hairstyles of the Season - with the big reveal at the end of the year. So far, we have a number of utterly lovely contenders:

Crash: Thick, beautiful twisted interpretation of the simple bun.  The dangly hair sticks add an element of interest.

Burn: I love the elegance of this up-do. Just perfect and shows off that lovely neck and tattoos of hers. Sif Wulfsdottir, Toreador of Baltimore - hats off! :)

Crash:  Faux bangs, Bettie Paige style accented with a little floral fascinator.  Very nice.


Burn:  This lovely Rock-a-billy style is being sported by Olivia, Brujah from Hartford. Love it.

Crash:  The deep burgundy curls of Juliette, Toreador Seneschal of Westchester County, NY fall beautifully around her cheekbones in this carelessly elegant updo.  Bravo.


Burn:  This dramatic upsweep with the stray lock is a show-stopper! Love the color! Snaps!












Gossip!


Darlings! While the fashion at G&G was fabulous, that Debbie Downer, Elias Beecher, did some very bad things - and we are not going to give him one more ounce of ink. No more.

It is actually quite hard to focus on Glitter and Gloom, children - entirely because Archons from the Ventrue and Gangrel Offices have completely reset the news cycle!!  Seriously! Seriously!  Did you hear that Archon Luigi Falcone  paid over 120 boons to spend the night with Archon Cecilia Stills?!?  OMG. That must have totally reset the boon market!!

Okay, back to G&G - Darlings! The delicious and apparently irresistible Ventrue Ryan Easley of Portland, Maine, received not one but TWO marriage proposals at Glitter and Gloom! Pompeii Maxius  and Prince Eleanor Deers are going to have to battle it out for Ryan's heart - as Ryan turned them both down!!

We're always looking for submissions. If you saw something great (or something greatly unfortunate) send it out way. Also, in light of the recent silence... We hereby offer to put your party announcements, public cries of outrage and other such things in our humble publication. Hit us up by the usual means.

 Darlings! That is all we have for now! Look for more juicy gossip soon!

 Kisses!
XOXO
Crash & Burn
 

Midwinter 2013

Well, well, well, my sweet dark sweethearts, welcome to the Anniversary Issue of Crash and Burn! As always, we start the Season with Midwinter!

And what a Start to the Season! Obviously, this shall be a season to remember!

However, one thing not to remember - this year's theme. Legend of Avalon - oh boy, so high school. So Renaissance Faire, so forgettable.


Best Dressed

Crash: The dashing, daring and dangerous Francis Merivein, Tremere, formerly Archon, now Prince of Chicago, was positively predatory in his two-tone shark skin pinstripe suit with hot pink accents.  Pimp.

Burn:  Wait wait wait. Since when were Tremere allowed to have style?!? All I want to know is whether or not Prince Merivein (who we really need an awesome nickname for - now taking suggestions!) is going to wear shoes as awesome as his predecessor.  However, dear Prince Merivein, we expect greatness out of you, after this fabulous start to your reign. Woo. Snaps in Z formation!

 Crash: The ever-stylish Lady Black, Malkavian, was more Victorian than Arthurian in feel, but the anachronism was a welcome departure from the Kindred day at the Renaissance Faire that was happening all around here.  The black on black sparkle, and the self trim of this bustle-y number was exemplary.

Burn: We heard that Lady Black was yelled at for defending the Camarilla. Scandalous! On the part of those who were yelling. Dearhearts, please, we know you all are just jealous of Lady Black's utterly faaaaaaabulous sense of style.

 Crash:  Adrienne Stratton, Tremere,  took the "Mists of Avalon" theme and wore this wonderfully romantic soft gray velvet and lace ensemble with a Lord of the Rings vibe that had me thinking "Otherwordly Elegance". Well done, Dr. Stratton.


Burn: Love the jewelry. This look (actually, the whole damn theme) is not working for me, mind you, but the lovely Ms. Stratton was a stunning vision regardless.

 Crash:  Masako Hara channeled Frankie Avalon rather than Mists of Avalon, but it seems a lot of people preferred variations on this hard to nail theme.  Masako sparkled in a gaggle of "Lady-of-the-Lake" wannabes.  Seriously, gotta work on the footwear though.

Burn: Masako, as always, you are a total hottie. Love the fantastic sparkly dress, totally fresh! Sadly, your bit at Midwinter (Japanese girl with curse-words) is a bit tired. You rocked that last year, dearest. New material next year.)

Crash:  In an enchanting blue and white flowing nod in the general direction of theme and period, Rachel Dubhan, the ever-lovely Toreador Harpy from Middle Georgia shows the other bitches how it's done.  Each piece, including the sleeves, is separate. Under normal circumstances, I might say she was trying too hard, but  few others tried at all.  I can't wait to see what she does next.

Burn: Oh Rachel. Beautiful as always. The sapphire blue skirt, the matching embroidery on the sleeves as well as the corset top, the hair, just.. wow. Way to take a horrible theme and make it into a lovely outfit. Snaps in Z formation!







Worst Dressed

 Crash:  Thursday night's theme was "green".  Jean-Claude, Samedi, Harpy of Peoria, was a class act in his green frat boy costume.  Way to keep the Midwest a shining example of what not to do, bro.

Burn: A boa as a hat! What a... interesting idea.

Crash:  Sugarti... Katja Nothing had a rough night. The usually foxy and stylish former Prince instead wore some kind of sports-ball jersey and mostly got led around by the elbow by Jack Sebastien., the other half of Jackja.

Burn: Katja!!!  Where are the shoes!!!!! BRING BACK THE SHOES! Oh, my dear, my dear, this look - so not you. We know you lost your praxis, but pretty please, don't lose your amazing spark.

Crash:  Oh, Tommy, Tommy.  Tommy Truelove, Brujah Prince of Tampa.  We will always love you for your bold style, but this faux fur thing has gone too far.  Skinning stuffed animals and wearing them is a crime against fashion.

Burn: Oooh. Are hippy do-rags a thing now?












Best Shoes

Crash:  This lovely lady had the most spectacular Gaga-esque mirror stilettos imaginable.  They were covered in tiny pieces of mirror.  If she isn't a Malkavian, I'm offended.

Burn: Well! That's one way to look up someone's dress! Ahem! Actually, snaps! Those are some sexy, sexy heels, my dear.










Gossip

Darlings! Darlings! If you were not at Midwinter, you missed a big BANG of an event! And oh, my, what a bang it was! Six Justicars showed up and justice'd and killed Pinky Wheeler and Paul Walker... and then removed Lena! and Katja Nothing from their Praxises. (or is that Praxi?) Ohboy!

The *real* scandal of the evening; however, was how a couple of Archons actually kept the Prince of Milwaukee out of wherever that judicial-ness was happening!  Ooohboy! Feathers flew on that one!

Alright, alright, we lied! We lied! The actual biggest scandal was how many people dropped out of the Roast at the last minute!  Alexander Lazarion, Kate Davidson, Francis Merevein and Gilia Agrippa all dropped out at the last minute! For shame!!

Also of note: notorious bad boy, Elias Beecher tried to kill Prince Murray X, and is now bloodhunted in several Domains, Ambrosio Vasquez de Leon was killed (much to the anger of his clan) by a couple of Archons,  and this year's horrible theme was largely ignored. Thank God. No more Ren Faire!  For serious, Midwest.  Be watching in a few months when Baltimore puts you all to shame and shows you how it's done.  Again.

As always, contact us with you juicy gossip, embarrassing hi-jinx of your fenemies, and fashion dos and dont's across our great land.

xoxo,
Crash&Burn

Worst of 2012

As a nice little appetizer to our anticipated Midwinter, 2013 issue, here's a little something to play with.

Remember kids, themed events are not a license to forget.
We are watching.
We will make fun of you.

The Nominees for Worst Dressed of 2012

 Crash: Reese, then, Harpy of Milwaukee at Midwinter 2012

 Crash: Apollo from the Twin Cities at Midwinter 2012 in his Goblin King costume.

 Crash: Lena! in this unfortunate plaid dress at Columbus's Grand Elysium in July

 Crash:  Julius Cole, Prince of Philly, and that f@#$%ing hat,  at Columbus's Grand Elysium in July.

 Crash: Tony Maietta, Brujah from Maine at the Atlanta Event in September.

 Crash:  Rook and Harrow from Annapolis at Nonclave's "beach party" in August.

Crash:  Assamite, Quinn from Hartford, CT at the Northeast Event in November.

















Well, that's it, darlings! Just a taste to get you ready for Midwinter 2013! And it's a hot, hot issue!

xoxo
Crash & Burn

(OOC note:  Even though we may be vicious vapid bitches IC, we seriously and honestly appreciate your costuming.  It gives game its energy and fun when everyone brings their A game and wears some of the most amazing costumes, many created by their own hands.  Seriously, kudos to all of you who go the extra mile and make the effort.  Costuming is part of the fun of live action games.  Keep it coming, and we think you are the most daring, courageous, wonderful people that OWBN has to offer.)

2012 In Review

Well, well well, my sweet dark loves, what a YEAR IT HAS BEEN. We have seen the best, and the worst, out of the Kindred of the Camarilla (and a few Anarchs! And at least a couple of Giovanni!)  A year of the amazing couture and a year of crimes against fashion!

Milwaukee, we are looking at you. Oh yes, yes we are. After how Baltimore totally stood you up last year, we are expecting wonders. Do not disappoint us!

With that, we decided to give you all a reminder of the best of the best. Yes, darlings, here it is, the Best of 2012.

 Be sure to vote in the poll, and be on the look out for the poll for worst dressed of 2012 in the week leading up to Midwinter.

Nominees for Best Dressed

 Crash:  Midwinter: Vinny Velario and William Harkness of Baltimore and Portland, Maine respectively.

 Crash:  Glitter and Gloom, Ekaterina, Clan Ventrue, Baltimore.

 Crash:  Glitter and Gloom: Rachel Dubhan, Toreador of middle Georgia

 Crash:  Grand Elysium of the Bay Area, Alecto, Toreador archon.

Crash:  Lehigh Valley Conclave: Zoe, Toreador from PA

 Crash: Atlanta, Lilyanna Salvatore, Toreador, Seneschal of Middle Georgia.

 Crash: The Northeast Event, Anya, Brujah Prince of Hartford

 Crash:  The Northeast Event - Vinny Velario, Toreador from Baltimore.















 
Burn: Grand Elysium, Columbus, Lady Black

Coming soon, Nominees for Worst Dressed, and poll.

Dos and Don'ts for the 2013 Season

• Don't: No more Prom Themes. Seriously. Seriously! What's next, Kindred Under the Sea? Starry, starry night?  A Night in Paradise? Stairway to Heaven? Spend five minutes with a creative Toreador or with Tommy Truelove's drugs and come up with better ideas, party planners!
• Don't dress like Azrael Abyss, Prince of Sorrows. (But if you do, do it ironically and send us hilarious photo ops.)
• Don't be a stereotype.  You can do better.

• Do be adventurous! If you want to be written about (and we know you do!), wear something that will catch attention!
• Do make statements! Statement necklaces, statement shoes, statement hair, statement Fendi bag with an adorable little ghoul puppy in it!!
• Do accessorize.  Fabulous hats, gloves, distinctive jewelry.  Wear fabulous shoes (beauty is pain, darlings!)
• Do establish a signature item (Except you, Julius Cole.)
• Do: Tailoring.
• Do: Ladies, every single one of you, when in doubt, a little black dress can never go wrong.
• Do: Gentlemen, when all else fails, wear a suit.  For real.

That is all my dears!

xoxo
Crash and Burn

The Shoe Issue 2012

Darlings!!! 

Your long wait is over!  Here it is, darlings, our first annual* Shoe Issue!!! This past year we have been seeing some truly amazing shoes on the most darling and daring Kindred! We have also seen some crimes against fashion! Some true Ermahgerd! moments, my sweet dark things.

No holds barred, darlings, tell us how you truly feel about these winners and losers. 

WINNERS!

Crash: Anya, the not-so-silent Prince of Hartford, in sweet little vintage-inspired black satin slingbacks with an adorable little satin rosette.  The shoes far out-shined the blue polka dot dress she was wearing, but hey.  We'll take it.  Keep up the good work, sweetie.

Burn:  Pardon me, darlings, while I try to channel my inner Manolo here.  This sexy little open-toed black sling-back with the bow accent is a winner! However, Anya-darling, do please put some polish on those undead toesies of yours. Might I suggest OPI's "Lincoln Park After Dark"?

 Crash: Oh dear, sweet Sugartits, uh... Katja Nothing, at Columbus's Grand Elysium this July, after a disappointing overture at first, stepped up for a truly spectacular finish with these striking PVC platform stilettoes.  De-licious.

Burn: Oh, Katja, sweet Katja, if was not obvious we name you the Camarilla Shoe Princess of the Year. Sexy caged stilettos with a yummy polish! 

Crash:  Mason, from Buffalo shows off white hot spats at the PA Conclave this year with his simple, yet elegant and tasteful black square toes.

Burn: Mason, Mason, Mason. Once again, you show us how to walk with style. Perfect black and white split dress leather loafers. Just perfect.

 Crash: The stunningly gorgeous, dark haired turned heads in her classy black dress in Atlanta this September, but it was her shiny black leather open toed shoes that really caught our attention.  Talk about fantastic taste and a real sense of class.

Burn: A lovely set of strappy heels that shoe off those beautiful gams. snaps.

Crash: The red hot square toe croc embossed shoes with matching red socks and pants worn by a certain Setite were the bright shining stars of mens' fashion this summer. 

Burn: Well. It makes a statement, that's for sure! Snaps for the kindred trying to pull this one off and not wearing a boring black suit with a blue tie. 

Crash:  Vinny Velario, Toreador from Baltimore brought the house down at Anya's blues party in sweet croc embossed shiny blue square toes that look suspiciously inspired by a certain Setite's footwear at Grand Elysium in Columbus.  It seems someone was taking notes.  Glad to know we have such loyal (and fabulous) readers.

Burn: Oh, Vinny, darling, darling. Fabulous choice of footwear to go with the dark suit. Tres stylish and very daring. I love it. Love love love love love.

Crash: Sabine Reya, Westchester, at Columbus's Grand Elysium wearing these interestingly-textured multi-neutral-toned t-straps.  I swear this drawing does not do them justice.  They really were way cuter in person.  Rather 1920s inspired, but didn't really go with the more 1940s-inspired outfit Sabine was wearing.  Points for taking the risk.


Burn: Sabine, Sabine... brown suede pumps. Gag. 

Crash: Lots of great shoes at Columbus's Grand Elysium this year.  This pair of decadent red suede platform pumps with bloody red PVC heels had us panting.  More like this please.


Burn: OMG, children. I am fanning myself here and praying I don't rochechek, because, omg, those red pumps are on fucking fire! Hot, hot, hot. Come fuck me pumps indeed! Ahem. Darling. Seriously. Ahem.

 Crash: Jenny Talia, Primogen of Washington, DC at the  Baltimore Glitter and Gloom event taught the assembled Kindred there all about classic black heels. Simple, understated, and timelessly elegant.  Take notes, people.

Burn: Oh, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny. Not only do we love your name (and oh, we do), we love your sense of style. These shoes completed your look at Baltimore, and my god, you are a sexy, sexy woman -- and too much for one man, if you know what I mean, children. 

 Crash: Selene Lazarion, in Baltimore at Glitter & Gloom sexy satin open toed shoes with an interesting textural detail and a little  kitten heel every bit as cute as she is.

Burn: I am very afraid if I say anything bad about these shoes, Selene Lazarion would light me on fire. So I won't. But seriously.  Well done.


 


Crash: At 2012's Midwinter, the one, the only the slightly addictive, Roxy Codone, childe of Tommy Truelove, Prince of Tampa, rocking the most amazing red satin corset-back open toed platforms.  This girl makes stripper shoes look classy.  What a gift.  Midwinter

Burn: Oh. Roxy. Oh Foxy Roxy, these amazing platform red stilettos are so so you. I am sure you were breaking every man's undead heart and turning every woman at Midwinter's heart green with envy.




LOSERS!


 Crash: Masako Hara at Baltimore's Glitter and Gloom had a seriously hit-or-miss weekend.  We loved the black wiggle dress, but the red one, and the deeply unfortunate sandals she paired with them was not her best work.


Burn: Masako - Gladiator shoes?? Really?? With pink polish? Did Kanye West dress you too?  Gah. Well, I suppose even a fashion goddess like yourself has a bad shoe day.

Crash: The shoes Lena! was wearing at Columbus's Grand Elysium this year came from a discount "intimates" shop for Japanese school girls with a serious tentacle problem.  

Burn: Oh Lena! You are not a 14 year old girl! Those plaid puppy heels ...with bows. Seriously. With bows???? Seriously? Seriously! Seriously! Please, girlfriend, you are a Prince of the Camarilla. Stilettos. Doc Marten Shit-Kickers. Ballet flats. Anything but plaid puppy heels. Seriously.

 Crash:  It seems this year at Nonclave, everyone came down with a serious case of the fashion fuck-its.  These tall Converse All Stars with stud details, in a classy pairing with ripped up fishnets are seriously special.  Like, 90s high school special.

Burn: Fuck it. It's Nonclave. No one cared. Obviously. OBVIOUSLY. 

Crash:  Open-toed shooties.  WTF?  Shooties.This kindred, cracked blue toenail polish and all, has clearly failed.
Burn:  I rest my case on the no one caring at (or about) Nonclave. Ew. Just... no.

Crash:  Nothing says easy, breezy, beautiful like over-sized plastic sandals.  Seriously, you're not even trying.  Just because it's Nonclave doesn't mean you don't have to at least try.

Burn: ... I have no words. Oh wait. I do. Crash -- WHY do you make me look at the ugly??? WHHHHHHHHHHY!! Why do you do this to me! What Kindred couldn't make even the *smallest* of efforts to wear a nice sandal. These...these things are an abomination!! 

 

Gossip! 

 And because it is us, we can't have a issue with a hint of gossip!!!

• Blind item! What Tremere Archon has a giant crush on Cassandra Sumner? We heard that a certain Prince fancies her as well and is refusing to share! In fact, the Prince in question told her and others present at a gathering that the Archon was trying to wrap a bow around her!  Sadly Cassandra doesn't feel like being re-gifted this year, and has declined to return his affections.  This made the Archon quite upset when he was there to collect such a pretty package!  

We can't wait for Midwinter, pretties, to see what you all do with the theme.  Until next time!

XOXO,
Crash & Burn

(OOC - Once again, we love your costuming! And shoes! Snaps to Katja Nothing's player for the idea. Take nothing we say in a bad way OOC.)