Friday, March 30, 2012

Ask Dr. Loveless #1

Lately it seems like all of my friends are getting married or at least have girlfriends and I'm starting to feel like I'm behind the curve or missing out on something. I know a lot of guys who use seduction just to get what they want, and I've done it before too, but never with another vamp. Am I the weird one for thinking it's odd?

Third Wheel


No, it's not odd. A lot of vampires feel the same way as you do, TW. Many of the marriages that happen between kindred couples aren't about love at all, but instead focus on political alliances. Think of it as a mix of Romeo and Juliet meets arranged marriages but with less passion and/or happy endings. Getting married in public can be an excellent way of telling your friends (and enemies) that you have an alliance with your spouse. Thus messing with one of you means messing with both.

We were all mortal once, and in that time many of us experienced love on several levels. Our hearts would flutter, we'd get butterflies in our stomachs, and the endorphins would flow freely. But we're dead now, and those responses just don't happen anymore, at least not naturally.

I'm not saying that every relationship between kindred is false, but, TW, you don't need to feel left out and you're certainly not an awful person for thinking it's odd. If you haven't found that special someone yet, don't try and force it. And if you do have someone you want to allign yourself with, there are other options than marriage. Consider simply backing their political plays with your own name, or making your friendship a commonly known thing. Hire your local Nosferatu to spread rumors of your alliance if you really want it out there.

**

My BF and I are really close, and normally he's really considerate and sweet to me. Lately though, he's been acting like he doesn't trust me. He's been having the Sheriff follow me and act as my bodyguard and now he's saying that we should share our blood so we can be closer. I'm not sure what to do about his paranoia. How can I help him get past it?

-Feeling Like I'm Suffocating


First and foremost, do not, I repeat, do NOT share your blood with each other. Blood bonding the one you 'love' can have a similar effect as the chemical responses your brain used to have, it can make you feel the kind of love for your chosen that you had for your first crush. It's a powerful drug, but it's a dangerous game that can have disasterous results.

If your mate is trying to force this on you then it might be time to find a different mate, FLIS. You can try talking to him, and setting some ground rules as you reassure him of your loyalty. If he's scared for your safety, then having a bodyguard isn't unreasonable, but he should explain why he wants you to have one and tell you about what he's feeling. Asking you to bind yourself to him isn't something you're comfortable with, and if he can't accept that, then he can't respect your rules, and you deserve someone who will.

If you're afraid of what he will do to you, or that he will try to force this on you, then you need to get out now. Don't take the risk and find yourself brainwashed or bloodbonded into loving him.

**

I've been having an affair with a powerful Kindred a few cities over, and it's been hot as hell for us. We have a similar libido and we're into the same kinks. Only problem is we're not in the same sect. I don't want to out him and he doesn't want to out me, but neither of us is willing to change sides just for sex. Should we keep meeting in secret and hope we don't get caught or is it time to call it off for good?

Hot and Heavy

HAH, cross-sect (and sometimes cross-clan) relationships can be tricky, and if it's not for anything more than sex? I'd say end it before you find yourself dead. You can find another sexual partner that will get your motors running without risking your lives.

Have a question for Linda Loveless? Need advice? Send a text to (316)555-0121 ((ooc: The phone is a burn phone with no traceable owner, send actual IC correspondence/texts to Dr.LindaLoveless@gmail.com))

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